Updated: May 27
"Childhood trauma can lead to an adulthood spent in survival mode, afraid to plant roots, to plan for your future, to trust, to let joy in. It is a blessing to shift from surviving to thriving. It is not simple but there is more than survival." ~Thema Bryant-Davis
"I had to learn how to smile... To truly smile from the space of bliss deep within my being. My bliss reappeared after re-conditioning, re-writing, and re-creating my hero story as I dream it into existence." ~Tara Hartley
Unfortunately, I had early childhood trauma that included extended periods of emotional and physical neglect, various forms of abuse, and inconsistent caregiver bonding – most of which occurred during my first year of life. I was in an out of emergency foster care situations from the time I was born until I was placed in my first foster-to-adopt home then legally adopted by the people I call Mom and Dad.
This took place during the early 1990’s when the western world was just beginning to identify childhood trauma, understand the long-term ramifications of it, and learn how to effectively treat someone who experienced significant pre-verbal abuses. By the time I was 6, my parents desperately sought help for my emotional and behavioral issues. They found a therapy group that catered to adoptees and their families. While I was under the care of the first therapist and subsequent therapists, I was given several diagnoses, made to take a variety of dangerous medications (some of which are no longer on the market), and suffered more abuses at the hands of those who were meant to help.
By the time I was a 15, after being re-triggered by visiting my birth mother for the first time in nearly a decade, I started running away from home, I developed an alcohol problem, and I began engaging in dangerous sexual relationships. I remember feeling a deep sense of self-hatred at the time. I felt lost. I felt out of control. I was seeking oblivion to escape my pain. Because the relationship with myself was so damaged, I attracted damaged relationships with others.
It wasn’t until I became pregnant with my daughter that I was fully able recognize the spaces where my childhood wounds had left me stuck in survival mode. Even before she was born, my daughter gave me the push I needed to seek help outside of the traditional western therapeutic system. I went back to school soon after she was born, became involved in leadership programs, began taking care of my health holistically, and started seeing a new therapist who also happened be very spiritual.
I explored new healing modalities in the form of crystal energy healing, sound bathing, and tarot cards. In 2020, I received White Light Reiki levels I, II, & III attunements from Nic Santos and Dr. Chris Lipat at Mind-Body Energy Medicine in Honolulu, Hawai’i. Those attunements have helped illuminate and heal wounds on the physical, emotional, and spiritual planes in myself and others.
I moved to New Mexico in January 2021 with the intention of helping others who have experienced significant trauma. My professional practice has evolved along with my own personal transformative process. I started implementing creative storytelling coaching services after my own creativity was re-activated during my 30th birthday trip back to O’ahu last year when I was attuned to Karuna Reiki Levels I & II.
As a kid, I was always very creative. I loved reading fantasy novels, writing about animals, and painting. Somewhere along the way I forgot my true creative bliss. It was lost amidst the pain of surviving trauma.
Using my 3-step creative healing process that includes energy healing, art, and storytelling, I’ve found a new way to create my dream life where I am truly free to thrive. I'm proud to say that I've gone from living a downtrodden life full of severe physical, mental, and emotional pain to living a natural life full of love, peace, and joy. I still experience hardships. I still have some ups and downs like every other human being. The difference is, now, I can overcome any obstacle with more ease and grace than before I started using my creative healing process.
Stay tuned for next week’s topic: The Kukui Healing Process - Thriving in Three Steps